5 Steps to Approach an Unknown Person

- January 23, 2022

She walks in beauty, like the night

Of cloudless climes and starry skies;

Not just a Byron’s composition, but it’s how our retina works, it’s how the rods and cones paint the world, because deep down it is etched that “First Impression is the Last Impression”. But don’t take this amiss, Impression is not superficial, it is the footnotes we walk on with a person, it’s getting along with them. We always ache for a timeless makeover. It is that make-up touch-up that moulds us to a prettier one. However little do we care about it, how to be socially appealing is par for our course. Isn’t it?

Let’s not beautify faces but souls. Below are some ways listed down for you to befriend the Unknowns and add some more radii to your circle.

1. Listen, Observe and Speak

As, Jay Danzie rightly quoted, “Your smile is your logo, your personality is your business card, how you leave others feeling after an experience with you becomes your trademark.”

There is always an aid to each trade. LISTEN, OBSERVE, SPEAK is the ultimate mantra to deal with alien faces. This spell never fails. Listen to each word uttered, observe even the petty details of one’s behaviour, speak only when the tiniest cells of your body ratify their tribe. In expansion, Words convey literal as well as metaphorical meanings of our personality. You can decode a great deal about one’s motive by the way one delivers its speech, here observation is the key. Keep your keen eyes on them, don’t jinx it by scrolling down your phones. So, the next time, you meet someone lend an ear, be a good listener then speak your heart out. A good voice modulation is worth giving a try; it makes you pleasant to hear. Omit “Hmmmm” and ”Yeahhhh” kind of words when they seek your views, it shows your lack of interest in the topic. Participate, don’t just nod. But when they are speaking don’t fall in, learn the Turn-taking norms.

2. Common Denominators

“Birds of a feather flock together.”

Not only animals, but humans also choose their comfort in the proximity of other fellow human-beings. They don’t wander about in crowds, yet they desire for a one in the crowd. Each one of us is a part of the foliage, a withered flower with a smiling petal, grew apart but grown together.

The sense of familiarity with the unfamiliar-s starts from the same dot; a commonality both shares. May it be Rowling’s famous Harry Potter or Sachin’s straight drives, may it be Rabindra sangeet or AP Dhillon’s grooves. It helps in subscribing the conversation channel. Talk on the topics of mutual interest and delve deep into it. Avoid vexatious topics that can irk the other one. It’s like praising Jaddu’s catches the day MI dropped the match-winning catch. Asking the whereabouts and wherefrom may look time-worn, but “How’s the weather there?” is still timeless.

Divided by chance united by choice. For an instance we see the biggest fanbase of K-pop, K-drama and Anime! It won’t be wrong to say that it has not only contributed to the threefold-uttered Entertainment but also in binding geographical differences; 'Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam'. People from each latitude and longitude share such an immense bond through a slight link of a show. Take a note, when people sitting in the extreme corners slay together, why can’t two people though unknown sitting in a room stay together!

3. Good Sense of Humour

A good sense of humour; a cherry on top. People with good sense of humour make the best of friends. It becomes easier to carry on the conversation, one may get tired of speaking but won’t get bored of hearing from them, it builds up the bond.

No wonder why the people loving Stand-up comedy is proliferating.

All you need is a good start, a compliment adds feather to the cap. The compliments should be genuine; pretty lies are welcome but don’t exaggerate. Giving compliment is therefore both progressive and regressive. Accept the compliments from the other side with gratitude. Give them reasons for more such meets.

4. Confidence is the Key

Posing a confident gesture, a good body posture while you introduce yourself is foremost. Keep a sweet smile on your face and not a ghostly grin. It’s just a HI, you don’t need to practise the way you do it for your crush. It aggravates the social anxiety. You can take a grip by putting up open-ended questions, so it would no more be a conversation but a healthy discussion. But never overdo it, don’t gloss over their opinions; remember a shift from conversation to discussion is hale and good but starting an argument is the worst. Express clear thoughts in perfect chronology, don't beat around the bushes.

5. Open Newspaper and Closed Diary

Confused! You needn’t be. It simply says that when we find someone with parallel energy, we tend to overshare all about our private business. May it be academic excellence, financial status or the love of our lives, which in later life turns out to be a rattrap. When we share our intimate details, e.g., bank balance and all such possessions, we are vulnerable to theft and robbery. The intentions of a person can sometimes be deceptive, it could be a donkey in lion’s mane. So, it is always better to speak in grams, no more no less.

There are certain people who you can open up with, open newspapers revealing all lies, and with others, closed diaries concealing all truths.

BONUS TIP

Opinions differ and we must respect it.

Socio-Social; Society-Societal!

The Socio-linguists in pursuit of Social well-being; in a pettifogging Society with multi-storey Societal expectations.

In short, we often judge people at a glance and talk about society and culture, the world in all its form expects us to move mountains with the blow of our ‘Sanskaar’.

So, the next time you meet someone, drop the judgements and hug the scars.